She�s right.

But there�s a difference between porn and European horror: you usually don�t masturbate while watching European horror movies, and if you do, you�re probably some psychotic with a viscera fetish.

I, on the other hand, adore Euro-horror. There�s a distinct difference between, say, an Italian horror movie and an American one.

In an American horror movie, it�s all about false scares. A lone girl walks into a dark room, and we - the audience - are all tense, waiting for the madman to leap out of the shadows and gut her with his Bowie knife. She nears the closet and slams it open, only to have a cat scrambled into her hands, effectively scaring her and making us roll our eyes.

In a European horror movie the same thing would happen, but when she caught the cat, it would proceed to tear her flesh to pieces, effectively eliminating her from the cast of characters.

Anyhow, on to the review.

A couple of fairly attracting Italian schoolgirls (although they look to be in their mid-to-late twenties) get a couple free tickets to the screening of a new horror movie at the local cinema. Once there, another semi-main character dons the mask of a demon, scratches her cheek, and ends up becoming a demon. Pretty soon, everyone�s fighting for their life, blah blah blah. It all can be summed up in pretty much one word: BLOOD. Well, make that three words: BLOOD, and Motley Crue. No, wait. Five words: BLOOD! Motley Crue! Billy Idol!

Yes, nothing defined cheesy 80�s horror like the soundtrack. You know something�s up when you�ve got three 80�s punks tooling around town in a stolen car, snorting coke and blaring Billy Idol over the stereo.

This movie, despite its total lack of a coherent plot, still remains one of my favorite, and if Suncoast Video up at the Nittany Mall doesn�t get it in on DVD, there WILL be hell to pay.