I�ve seen better things come out of my ass after I�ve eaten six tacos and two bowls of chili.

The plot - what I could make of it - involved Christopher Lee and a midget attempting to rid the world of werewolves. This movie has it all: fuzzy people fucking, a midget getting thrown out a window, Christopher Lee making out with a werewolf... everything a good horror flick needs, right?

Wrong-o, boyo.

Reb Brown (!) and Annie McEnroe (who I had - mistakenly, of course - thought was a tennis player) as lovers who go in search of the evil lycanthrope responsible for turning Reb�s sister into a mean version of Tiger from The Brady Bunch.

They meet up with Christopher Lee and, with the help of about fifty Transylvanian rednecks (I thought it was vampires who occupied Transylvania?), proceed to track down and kill these vicious sock puppet-like monstrosities.

Get this: the werewolves in this picture can only be killed by pure *titanium*. Fuck silver! We don�t need no steenkin� silver! We�ll use titanium! I'll tell ya, these must be some pretty special werewolves. Stupid fuckin' Hollywood people and their stupid fuckin' "original ideas". Bastards!

Well shit.

At least there were two decent things about this movie: Sybil Danning�s tits. Repeatedly. At least fifteen times. All in the span of two minutes. My Bog, I must�ve freeze-framed that particular scene at least twenty times while I.... oh.... oops. Nevermind.